Zutara month drabbles
by emletish
Summary: What it says on the tin lovelies.
1. Relief

Western Air Temple, Kitchen, night:

Zuko: (muttering to self) I can't believe she hid these again. Every friggin time. Didn't even **do anything** this time.

(thinking out loud – more clearly) Okay, this is easy. I just have to **think like her.** So I'm Katara. And I'm bossy and friggin irate. Where do I hide the fireflakes?

Katara: (entering) Did you just call me?

Zuko: (nervous) No?

Katara: I thought I heard you say my name.

Zuko: No I didn't.

Katara: (hands on hips and juts her hip out. Zuko is momentarily distracted.) Were you talking to yourself or the frogs again? It's the first sign of madness you know. You could be going crazy.

Zuko: (muttering) I think I'm already there...

Zuko: (directly) Katara, now that you are here, would you mind telling me where did you hide my fireflakes this time?

Katara: (condescending) That proves it – you are going crazy. First the talking to yourself and now the paranoia.

Zuko: I'm not paranoid. I know you hid them!

Katara: (quick glance to the cupboard on the left) No I didn't.

Zuko: (triumphant) ah –ha! They're in here, aren't they?

(Zuko bends down to investigate cupboard to the left. Katara stares at his posterior)

Zuko: Yes! I bloody knew it! They are here.

Katara... (dazed) Sorry? What did you just say?

Zuko: I said I found the fireflakes. _Again._

Katara: (sarcastic) Well that is a _big relief!_ I can't even begin to tell you how relieved I am that you found your nasty, disgusting, awful, fattening, and smelly snack. Really I was _worried._


	2. Luminous

Cave of Two Lovers. After dinner.

Zuko: Seriously, where are we going?

Katara: I told you, it's a surprise.

Zuko: (grumpy) You know how I feel about surprises.

Katara: (cheerful) Trust me, you are going to like this one.

Zuko: (Ranting) Well I'm not liking it right now. I'm in a manky, badgermole-infested cave. I have no idea what is going on. First you grab me after dinner, and you were all like "oh let's go for **a walk**". And I was keen at the start because I thought you meant like our normal "**walks**" but Noooo! We _actually go on a walk_ through the woods, and we walked for hours!

Katara: (interjecting, amused) We walked for 20 mins.

Zuko: Look, we've walked for a lot longer than we normally do, when we go on our "**walks**".

Katara: We're almost there. Okay, here. Put out your fireball.

Zuko: But then we'll be in pitch blackness. We wont be able to see a thing. I kind of prefer being able to _see _the badgermoles coming before they eat my face off.

Katara: A badgermole wont come an eat your face off. That would just be the worst random, terrible, bad luck.

Zuko: You can't say that for sure. Random, terrible, bad luck happens to me all the time! (Katara makes face to acknowledge the truth contained in previous statement.)

Katara: Seriously though. Just **trust me**, and put it out.

Zuko: Fine, but I still don't see what is so special about hanging out in a pitch black cave. (extinguishes fireball in right hand.)

(The cave ceiling is filled with hundreds oh luminous crystals which project a soft green light).

Zuko: (awed, staring entranced at the ceiling) Woah!

Katara: (grinning) Told you you'd like this surprise. (She slips her hand into his).

Zuko: What is this place?

Katara: The Cave of Two Lovers. This is where Oma and Shu came when they wanted to...go on **walks.**


	3. Potential

Western Air Temple - Orchard. Afternoon.

Zuko: (defensive) Look, the Duke has real potential. For all we know, he could be the greatest swordsman ever. And I promised him I would teach him. So no, I'm not going to cancel our lesson - just because you're getting your knickers in a twist about it.

Katara: (irate) Well maybe you have the potential to be the most…..(she takes a step forward to invade his space) no, you **are **the most (she punctuates these words with a poke to the chest) irresponsible (poke) annoying, (poke) boy in the history of ever (really big poke).

Zuko: (flustered by Katara's very close proximity) Well maybe you have the potential to be the most….the most…the bossiest girl in the entire world. (very indignant) This lesson is going to **go great **and I'm going to **prove it to you!**

Katara: (Scoffing) I would like to see that. Tell you what - I'm going to watch! If he pokes you in the eye – I'm not healing it. I'll just laugh.

Zuko: (brash) Good! I want you to have a front row seat for when** I Prove You Wrong. **

Katara: (snidely) well, there's a first time for everything.


	4. Change

Change.

Rendevous Island. Before dinner.

Zuko: It's just – she's **seriously angry** at me again now. And I have absolutely no idea as to why.

Toph: Why do you even care? I thought Katara avoiding you and not talking to you would be a blessing, considering how she_ normally_ talks to you. At Least she's not nagging you at every bloody turn now.

Zuko: (softly) I kind of miss the nagging.

Toph: (incredulous) Well, you've changed your tune.

Zuko: No, just changed my mind. I've been wrong about a lot of things previously, you know.

Toph: But you used to hate the way she was always harping at you. You used to have a big fat bitch to me about how she's was the bossiest girl in the entire universe.

Zuko: ( defensive) Okay – firstly, I wasn't having a big fat bitch – I was just…airing an understandable grievance.

Toph: Whatever you say, Mr Grievance-airer. Look, if you want my advice – just ignore her right back. Stop chasing after her. She can't ever stick to these "I'm never talking to you again" resolutions. Katara_** always** has to have the last word._ She'll crack and nag you again soon.

(Zuko smiles widely at the prospect of a nagging from Katara soon. Toph senses his elation.)

Toph: You big weirdo! How can you like her harping at you and treating you like you're _her personal_ _cleaning up the kitchen slave?_

Zuko: I dunno…it's just…..she harps because she cares….and it was kind of nice. And I never minded cleaning up the kitchen with her. (slightly admonishing) She shouldn't have to do all the work on her own, you know Toph.

(slight pause before Zuko continues diffidently in the face of Toph's growing disbelief).

And you know…we'd do the dishes together and have these chats. I kind of miss that.

She's really quite funny you know…

and she makes me laugh and (Toph makes a face)

**Whatever Toph!** (Toph makes another, different face)

Don't make that face!...

I'm not even being a weirdo now and …

and I don't have to explain myself to you.

Toph: Do you like_…fancy_ her or something?

Zuko: I do not!

Toph: You liar! You so do!

Zuko: (deflecting) Well, it wouldn't even matter if I did because she hates me again.

Toph: She doesn't hate you.

Zuko: (sullenly) Well, she's certainly acting like it.

Toph: Hey, listen, it's nearly dinner. Just be her adoring kitchen slave again after dinner and I'm sure you'll be back in the good books...or ask Sokka. He always knows what's bothering Madam Fussybritches when she gets like this.


	5. Serenade

Serenade.

Zuko and Katara, on a date night. They are at the late night showing of "the Prince and the Peasant – a tale of forbidden love".

Zuko: I can't believe I let you drag me to see this. This is going to be the worst play of all time.

Katara: Firstly, I didn't drag you. I only suggested it.

Zuko: You suggested it like 8 million times, three of those times while we were...(He does a hand gesture here to indicate the activity in question)... And you know I can't say "no" while.._.that _is happening.

Katara: You might enjoy this play. I've heard the Ember Island Players have really come a long way since _The Boy in the Iceberg. _This play has pretty good reviews.

(They both simultaneously glance at their programs to look at the reviews).

**" Not as long as some other plays."**

**"Most of the audience watched until the end."**

**"The songs were only mildly ridiculous."**

Zuko: I am predicting that this will be the worst play we've ever seen.

Katara: It's a play about us – how can it be bad when we are so awesome?

-o-o-

Curtain rise – The actor playing "Prince Zoku" stomps on stage melodramatically.

Zuko: Aaah! Again! How could they have messed this up again? The scar is has always been on the left side! Why is this so hard for these imbeciles! They never get it right!

Katara: Well maybe they weren't sure and just took a guess. I mean it's a fifty/fifty chance. Maybe they flipped a coin?

Zuko: My face is on the money! The answer would have been right in front of them and they still got it wrong. I wonder what else they've messed up.

-o-o-

The Actor playing "Peasant Takara – Waterbending master" does a ribbon dance on stage. She is wearing a fur bikini and launches into a boppy tune entitled "Being a stinky barbarian is so much fun".

Katara: Well I never! That is just insulting – the Water Tribes aren't like that!

Zuko: Well the Ember Island Players have never been known for their accuracy. And you know, I bet this isn't even the most ridiculous point of the night. It's only going to get worse from here.

Katara: Well I don't see how it can get much worse!

-o-o-o-

On stage there are some shenanigans involving flying bison, avatars, desperate missions and pirates. For inexplicable reasons, Peasant Takara climbs a tower and sighs moonily over Prince Zoku. The moony sighing seems to summon Prince Zoku, as he bursts onto the scene, whilst simultaneously bursting into song.

Zuko: What the actual fuck? Am I serenading you now!

Katara: Looks like it... and you're doing a pretty poor job of it. This song** is just rude. **It sets a very bad example for young girls. Who serenades a girl with a song called _Ride my big, throbbing, walrus baby - you know you want to _? Seriously now, who writes this crap?

Zuko: I'm guessing the same writer who brought us "I love willies".

-o-o-o-

On stage, Peasant Takara swoons over the song and deigns to come down from her tower to deliver the following line: Oh you sexy beast – I want your _purple-headed penguin_ between my _Tui and La_ – right now.

Zuko: (nearly dies from gigglesnorting.)

Katara: Okay, it's official. This is the most ridiculous moment of the play.


	6. Desired

Desired.

A Bed. Late at night. A couple are in various states of undress. They are making out.

Zuko: It's just….I can't believe this is really….you're here. I'm here. We're both here and... we're _doing this. _Like…I've wanted this for so long and now _it's all happening._

Katara: How long?

Zuko: What?

Katara: How long have you…desired me?

Zuko: A _very long_ time.

Katara: Seriously, when-ish did you start fancying me?

Zuko: I'll tell you - if you tell me when you started fancying me.

Katara: Deal.

Zuko: (Hesitant) Well, I don't know when it started, but _I knew _that I fancied you when…do you remember that day in the orchard, back at the Western Air Temple? When I gave you the moonpeach?

Katara: (Pleasantly surprised) Since then!? _That's ages!_ Why didn't you say anything sooner?

Zuko: Because I thought I was being a **delusional, sad, mad fantasist**. I didn't think you'd ever _want me back-_ did I?... (Katara gives him a kiss to show him how erroneous this notion was – he is convinced)...Now your turn. When did you...start desiring me?

Katara: I don't remember when. You just_ grew on me_ like mould.

Zuko: (indignant. Pulling away slightly.) Oh thanks a bunch. I'm like mould now?

Katara: Oh don't make that face. I didn't mean it _like that. _Mould was just the fastest growing substance I could think of. (She pulls him back into a kiss with her lady-wiles).

Zuko: (Determined to get a real, non-mouldy answer) You still haven't given a proper answer.

Katara: Okay- if I had to give a time when I started fancying you; it would be at the beach house, when I used to watch you train Aang. I told everyone it was for legitimate teaching purposes – but it wasn't.

Zuko: Is this like all the times you made me take my shirt off unnecessarily but said there was a **legitimate medical reason** for it?

Katara: (blushing) Maybe.

Zuko: Ah, so you fancied me for my _hot body_…. Geddit?

Katara: Actually it was your ability to make the lamest puns ever that won me over.

(There is a small interlude full of kissing,groping and devoid of conversation - aside from appreciative/lewd noises from both parties.)

Zuko: You realise that we could have been_ doing this _ages ago?

Katara: I guess we'll just have to….. make up for lost time. (She attempts a sultry wink that ends up looking like an involuntary eye-twitch. Thankfully she is with a boy who desires her anyway – eye twitch and all.)


	7. Pride

PRIDE

-o-

A monolgue of relationship advice re: Pride.

From Zuko. (An unlikely and reluctant source).

-o-

You want love advice _from me_? Seriously Aang? You've **met me** right? You know that this is like...not my area. Love advice is **not a subject in which I excel.** Why don't you ask my Uncle? No, he's never had a long term relationship with someone from a drastically different culture, but... Fine...urgh. Okay what's on your mind?

You said **what?!**

Oh buddy – she is** never going to sleep with you again!**

Well I guess the best advice I can give you is to apologise. You know, don't be too proud to admit when you're wrong. And you need to really listen to what Ty Lee is saying and ….

No one told me this was about Ty Lee, but I just assumed...

Well who is it about then?

I thought as much.

Nah, You and Ty Lee isn't nuts at all. I think you guys will work well together. She's the only one who can put up with you when you start blathering about being kidnapped by a lionturtle.

Hey, I'm just joking.

Listen to me though, about the apologising thing – because this is something I actually** do **know about. Like...you know...Katara and I, we used to have these stupid fights...over dumb things like naps or fireflakes or those disgusting stewed seaprunes...but then I'd make it worse by being **too proud **to just admit I was wrong and apologise...

Rookie mistake, Aang.

I realised that there was no point in winning a petty argument – if it meant that I lost her. Sometimes fighting for a relationship is as simple as conceding that stewed seaprunes are a delicious if** acquired taste** and being willing to try them again.

No I really will try them again! I meant it. I wasn't just saying that!

You have to** mean **your apology Aang – otherwise it doesn't count if you're not sincere. Don't say sorry, if you don't mean it.

No seriously...Katara means the world to me... and if I have to try stewed seaprunes again to make her happy...then you know...I'll eat a whole bucket full of the blasted nasty things.

Glad I could help.

* * *

notes: So the words Pride and Prejudice are forever linked in my mind thanks to Jane Austen, so it is only fitting that these two ficlets are linked too. Next up is unsolicted relationship advice re: prejudice from Katara.


	8. Prejudice

PREJUDICE

-o-

A monologue of (unsolicited) relationship advice re: Prejudice.

From Katara (an overeager and slightly despotic source. )

-o-

Hey Ty Lee, can I talk to you for a second.

No, you're not in trouble.

There's pink glitter WHERE?...But how?...Why?

No...it's fine...I can help you with ..._that._

But that wasn't what I wanted to talk to you about. I wanted to talk to you about your relationship with Aang. If you want my advice...

You don't?

Well just hear me out anyway and I'll help you with your...sparkly problem and never mention the glitter again.

Look, I know about that thing that Aang said and...

Zuko told me, but anyway...

No we weren't gossiping about you two, we were just...

Couples **talk** to each other alright! **Couple who last **have this thing called_ actual conversations. _It's where one person speaks and the other person listens and then you switch.

Oh come here...shhh, it's okay.

All I'm trying to say is that I know it's hard, being with someone who is so different, who grew up very differently. Especially early on because you don't know where all those differences are and then they come up and there can be all sorts of misunderstandings.

No, I know what you mean. When Zuko and I were first going out – things would come up all the time. It was like_ everything_ was different over here. Our Tribe went about everything differently. I'd often assume that the way my tribe did things was better. And he'd say something off-hand about the firenation and I'd jump to the worst conclusion. And then we'd have these arguments and I'd go off on these ill-advised rants.

And then it hit me...I was being just as prejudiced as all those people I fought against. I wasn't even trying to see it from his point of view. But when I put my prejudice aside and just really listened to him...we just started...

...gosh it was...

...err anyway...

I know going out with someone from a different culture can be hard – but I guess listening and trying not to jump to conclusions is the best advice I can give you. Be open with each other and be **open to** each other's perspective and you'll be much happier together.

What Aang said...well he didn't mean anything like_ that._ I know he doesn't think of you like that.

No, he loves you. I can tell.

I can see why you'd be mad...but Aang wouldn't have meant it like that. He's coming from a totally different perspective. It's just how the Airnomads did _things. _That was an deeply embedded part of their culture. Aang was raised to believe that is how _things _should be done. He wasn't trying to insult you honey, he was just trying to share some of his culture with you.

Yes I know you _do things _differently in the firenation...

...Mmmmmhhhhhhhhhhh...

...Sorry, what?

Yes! I think that's a great idea. You can share how the firenation _does things_ with Aang too. He'll **definitely enjoy** sharing that part of your culture with you.

Glad I could help.

Oh right – the glitter! Just let me get my gloves.

* * *

notes: So Pride and Predjudice take place when the Gaang are in their late-teens/early twenties. Zuko and Katara have been a couple for a few years. I love these prompts because I felt that they tackled what would be two issues for Zutara as a couple - Zuko's pride and Katara's predjudice. So this pair of drabbles is a sort of hindsight-look at how they dealt with these problems.


	9. Sublime

SUBLIME

-0-

**Note: I have interpreted this as "subliminal" - as in subliminal messaging.**

**Also this is set some time after predjudice. Zuko and Sokka have recently gotten into a ridiculous conversation about facial hair that has resulted in the two of them having a competition over who can grow a moustache the fastest.**

-0-

Late at night during a full moon. A couple are in a bed. One is sound asleep. The other is wide awake.

Katara: (very soft whisper in Zuko's ear) Tomorrow you will want to shave that terrible moustache off. Tomorrow you will want to shave that terrible moustache off. Tomorrow you will want to shave that terrible moustache off and admit that trying to grow it was a big mistake in the first place. Tomorrow you will realise that moustache makes you look like you have a fat caterpillar on you lip...

Zuko: (rolling over) mmsghrrmmm

Katara: (scooting closer to whisper in his ear again) Tomorrow you will want to...( Zuko rolls back over to his original position unexpectedly and collides with her)... gaah.

Zuko: (groggy) wassgoinon?

Katara: Nothing go back to sleep.

…...(there are a few minutes pause as Katara waits for Zuko to resume sleeping).

Katara: (soft whispering) Tomorrow you will want to shave that terrible moustache off. Tomorrow you will want to shave that terrible moustache off.

Zuko: What?

Katara: Nothing go back to sleep.

Zuko: How can I go back to sleep with you whispering in my ear about my moustache? Wait..**why** are you whispering in my ear about my moustache when I am asleep?

Katara: I was trying subliminal messaging okay.

Zuko: huh?

Katara: I was talking to Azula's therapist about it. Apparently suggesting things to people when they are asleep makes them much more open to the suggestion when they are awake.

Zuko: You want me to be open to the suggestion of shaving off the moustache? But it looks dignified.

Katara: It looks like you have a fat caterpillar on your lip!

Zuko: It does not!

Katara: It does too – I know! I'm the one that has to look at it all day.

Zuko: So you woke me up to let me know you hate the moustache.

Katara: I didn't mean to wake you up – you're meant to be asleep.

Zuko: So you're meant to be doing one of Azula's therapists "mind wigglers" on me.

Katara: Fine! I was. You caught me!... but I was desperate okay! I just...I really hate this moustache! You and Sokka are both such idiots. You're so stubborn about this **stupid bet. **But you both_ look ridiculous!_ And now every time you kiss me – it's all bristly and scratchy...and I just really want you to shave it off.

Zuko: But what about the bet with Sokka? If I shave it off, He'll win.

Katara: Well, I know if he doesn't shave it off, Suki is** never going to sleep with him again.**..so it will be a_ hollow victory. _

Zuko: (sharp inhale) oh, he'll cave in a second if Suki says that.

Katara: (thoughtful look) Will he now?...

...Okay Zuko, let me put it to you like this... (she raises one hand) your moustache and celibacy...or (she raises her other hand) no moustache and sex.

Zuko: (disgruntled) OhmiAgni. Fine! (He gets up.)

Katara: Oh don't be like that! Come back to bed! Where are you going?

Zuko: To shave it off!

Katara: I didn't mean now.

Zuko: Well I'm _awake now._


End file.
